Sunday, February 7, 2016

Just hold Me

Will there ever come a time
When I live more than half alive?
Will there ever come a moment
That I forget his torment?
Will there ever come a day
That I forget the way
He treated me worse than a cow,
That's how it felt anyhow.
Will there ever come a second
That I feel like more than a slut
More than a whore,
Even though no one calls me that
The words still ring in my ears,
Even though "I love you,"
Is mostly what I hear.
I've heard those words before,
Before being slammed into a door,
Choked til I passed out,
Smashed into a wall
Until I couldn't breathe at all.
So forgive me if "I love you"
Doesn't cut it.
I can't get past the memories
Of what he did to me.
I really want to believe
The things you say and do for me.
You've been nothing but wonderful,
But somehow I feel I don't don't deserve
Your love at all.
I feel so small.
I feel so very small.
Unlike a person at all.

Take me to some other place
Where I cannot see his face,
But only yours.
Help me see that life and love
Are things worth fighting for.
I cannot find my balance on the ground.
This world is too heavy,
But if you hold me, just maybe,
I can learn to stand.