I used to be normal
I used to have pep
There used to be thoughts in my head that mattered
And spring in my step.
I used to have hobbies.
I used to have fun.
There used to be days where I worked on a project
Until it was done.
I used to be happy
I used to have dreams
I used to make plans for the things I would do,
Now I'm lost, so it seems.
There once was a spark
In the depths of my soul
That told me that all was okay
And that I was whole.
Now I'm broken inside,
And the pieces are lost,
I can't trust anyone,
For I know the cost.
They would all sell me out,
If they knew what I thought.
So I stick to myself and my thoughts are my own,
They don't know what I've got.
They are wrong about me,
They've been wrong from the start,
But they never asked me what was wrong,
And I don't have the heart
To try to fix things now,
My records are fixed.
They didn't knew, I supposed,
I left them perplexed.
So in the place of knowing,
They picked from a book,
Without asking me questions
Or taking a look
At what was going on in my life
Or what I was dealing with.
They just made crude assumptions
"She's a crazy, bored housewife."
As if I had nothing better to do
Than spend 6 months in jail --
That my idea of fun was getting shots
And losing weight and growing pale.
What ever happened to my rights
As a human being, just like them?
They treated me like an animal,
Shoved from cattle pen to cattle pen.
With no consideration whatsoever
For my feelings or my care,
They simply put me away in a box
And forgot they put me there.
Instead of making their own diagnosis,
Or taking the time to observe me,
They relied on the words and opinions of others,
Which continues to unnerve me.
When will someone take the time to be
Objective?
Why are all these supposed professionals so
Subjective?
I did, after all, once have a life.
I had things to do, I had a job of my own.
I was a teacher and doing just fine
Until some idiot picked up the phone
And called in the cavalry to say,
"This lady's completely insane."
Sure, maybe I wasn't all "there,"
But their actions were just so inane.
They overreacted, that's clear,
And the didn't consult with me.
How hard would it have been to ask me
What was going on internally?
To ask what I was was thinking?
To ask what was going on?
To ask what I was feeling?
To ask me what was wrong?
But NO, that was never done.
Instead they took me away.
As if I were a criminal,
Who shouldn't see the light of day.
I used to care about getting justice
I used to care about finding peace
I sued to care about fixing my records
(As if that would bring me peace.)
I used to care about proving myself
I used to care what people thought.
I used to care how I appeared to the world.
But guess what, now I do not!
