Adrift

Adrift on a sea of nothingness,   
Just trying to stay afloat;
Wondering why I am flound'ring,
And wishing I had a boat.

I wouldn't say that I'm drowning;
That is silly -- I know how to swim!
But the waters flood all around me,
I'm engulfed by the mem'ries of HIM.

So many years have gone by 
Since he made me his unwilling slave.
Now here I am, decades later,
Still battling each stormy wave.

Up and down I wildly bob, 
While the flashbacks hit me like thunder.
The winds of regret buffet my sorry soul,
While the current of shame sucks me under.

I kick against the tangle of seaweed,
Those nightmares infesting my dreams.
No matter how happy my day might have been,
Still the night terrors come, so it seems.

I look for a sign 
Of an island nearby
A place I can rest,
Maybe curl up and cry.

But the tears never come 
They have run from me too,
So I drift in this ocean
Without knowing what to do.