Just a Ghost (Acrostic Sonnet)

When first he came and took his rightful prize,
He had to find me first and pin me down,
Yet somehow I just froze and closed my eyes.
Despite the pain, I lay without a sound.
I think I tried to hide a time or two;
Deterring him just never seemed to work.
No matter what I did or didn't do,
The time would come, and he'd just go berserk.
I don't know when or why I chose defeat,
For years it seemed the only thing to do.
I'd wave a flag of white and just retreat.
"God help me," I would pray; it's all I knew.
How many times did he take all of me,
Til I was not a woman, just a ghost,
Believing 'twas my lot to simply be
A piece of meat? I think that hurt the most.
Consid'ring how he left my soul for dead,
Keep asking what I should have done instead.

Little Me (Acrostic Sonnet)

Today I wandered way down in my soul.
How strange it felt to look at that again,
Allow no one to know, that was my goal,
To stash it deep inside til who knows when.
I somehow lost my childish innocence
Somewhere along the way, I don't know how.
Left on my own to try to make some sense,
I thought no one would understand me now.
The questions went unanswered that I had,
There was no one to rescue me from that.
Life taught me I was dirty, I was bad.
Each time I tried to rise, fate knocked me flat.
Maybe someday I'll dance with little me,
Earn her respect, and help her to be free.

My Private Hell (Acrostic Sonnet)

Can water flowing to the sea be still?
Are birds in flight allowed to take a rest?
Neither shall I of torment have my fill
Til every woe of mine with blood is blessed.
So many years with crimson I've shut out
The demons all around that had no name.
Obeying rules I didn't know about,
Put under some odd spell, I drowned in shame.
More comforting than Mother's loving kiss,
Yet somehow still as poison to my soul.
Surrender to the call, while knowing this,
Each healing wound is far beyond control.
Let no one enter in my private Hell,
For I have hidden all the scars too well.